Annoyance List Released.
HUMANITY : In its official capacity as the only university able to give scientifically
believable hypothises in respect to totally useless ,pointless and obvious information the
University of South West Middle America has released its all important list of ways to
annoy people in 1999. The list was officially launched by Professor Steven Dorkenhead who
was later egged, spat on and called many stange and ugly names.With that aside here is
this years list :
Leave the copy machine set to 99 copies,
reduce 300%, extra light, 17-cm paper.
In the notes area of all your cheques write
"for sensual massage."
Finish all your sentences with the words
"in accordance with prophecy."
Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers
running in all weather conditions "tokeep them tuned up."
Reply to everything someone says with
"that's what YOU think."
Specify that your drive-through order is
"to go."
Signal that a conversation is over by clamping
your hands over your ears.
Staple papers in the middle of the page.
Ask people what gender they are.
While making presentations, occasionally bob
your head like a parakeet.
(As you guessed this was one of those lists that came via email...The editor forced me to
print it as he liked it and has been doing the above things around the office for thepast
week.)
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